Dear baby Robert (RJ),
It’s been months waiting for your arrival. It has been sweet moments learning week to week about your growth, your strength, your “swimming pool” you occupied inside your mommy. Your ultrasounds became stories of what RJ looks like and imagining what you might be thinking. Your heartbeat was always the assurance we sought to hear, it meant you were still beating on. You had the greatest support team, and your mom, who never gave up hope on her baby.
I witnessed your mother risk everything she has, her life, doctors recommendations, loved ones in fear for both of you, for a chance to meet you. You both won. You had a live birth and your mother was there to greet you as you were welcomed into her arms. You are a miracle.
You were born on a Friday, September 18th, 2015, to be exact. Did you know you have lots of family born on the 18th? This is something we will always remember. You were also named after your grandfather, Robert, who was the greatest baseball player in the Giesen family! The Cardinals wanted him as a pitcher! Your middle name is James, after your dad’s, dad. He drove as fast as he could from New York to witness your birth. Your great grandmother and her dear friend, Dale, drove 22 hours straight to be there to witness your birth. You have two brothers who love you so much it hurts. Your brothers love, love, love, racing and they connected your clothing and blanket colors to a special race car driver they love, Sanders racing. So, now when we see this shade of light blue, we think “RJ” blue, because your brothers are certain you have racing blood in you too! There has been an outdoor of blue balloons released for “baby RJ”, from family and friends, friends of friends, because you have given them hope and they want to show their support!
There are so many things that connect you to us, RJ. And our reminders, and memories of our time together will never be forgotten.
Today was the day you grew wings and became our guardian angel. It has been hard for your family, your brothers, your dad, and your mom. We will miss you, so very much. But guess what, we are getting your messages from heaven already!
This morning, Zack and I picked out purple flowers for you and your mom, the woman who checked us out at Target, guess what her name was (you probably guessed), her name was Heaven! As I walked you out of you and your mothers hospital room today, apparently a bird kept flying into the window, did you have anything to do with that? We feel so. I also saw when your brother turn around, the back of his shirt read “Carpenter”, I suppose you have already met my nephew already! He likes baseball too! Finally, once Zack and I made our journey home from the hospital today, he opened old mail and it was a boat trailer title he had been waiting a long time for, guess who notarized it for him? An Angel!
Little RJ, I am thankful for getting to meet you, hold you, love on you, witness your baptism and become your Godmother. You are a gift, a miracle, and a special place in my heart. You have gone too soon, and I will never forget you.
Love always,
Nicole
